I could not finish this book. I found it quite tedious, so my mind would wander a lot when I was reading it. Hence, the writing in it. I chalked him up to a horny Virginia Wolff.
11/25/13
Tito's Vodka is on the plane!
In the front
In some perverse way, dysfunction is rewarded. My act of rebellion was to be well adjusted and competent. I was self sufficient. To need help was a sign of weakness. There was no need. My friends and relationship were chosen by want and whim, not necessity. Choice not need. I could walk away. I was independent. I would not be disappointed. I had freedom. I could leave.
In the back
"I have no money, no resources, no hopes. I am the happiest man alive." - Henry Miller
Not only do I understand this, I intellectually breathe this. It is in my molecular structure. This is who I am. Either by some good fortune of luck or happy genetic accident, I was born with the native personality of sunshine smiles. Optimists are born, not made. On the other hand, good people are made. Learning right from wrong, compassion, empathy, true altruism and a sense of community. These can be ingrained. The age old question of why do bad things happen to good people is futile. Bad things happen to everybody. Good fortune and tragedy visit all people, just sometimes not in proportion to what an outside observer feels they deserve. You can subscribe to the Karma or Chaos Theory, and each philosophy may be validated in equal measure. The incidents do not matter as much as the aftermath. How you clean up the mess is the real test of character. Coping separates the winners from the losers, and coping is HARD WORK.
History repeats itself only because people gravitate toward the familiar, no matter how destructive. Choosing the unknown path takes courage and resolve. Repeating the cycle of abuse no thought or effort. It is easier to self destruct than to change. Change is the more painful route, no matter how positive the outcome, or benefit to future challenges.
11/25/13
Tito's Vodka is on the plane!
In the front
In some perverse way, dysfunction is rewarded. My act of rebellion was to be well adjusted and competent. I was self sufficient. To need help was a sign of weakness. There was no need. My friends and relationship were chosen by want and whim, not necessity. Choice not need. I could walk away. I was independent. I would not be disappointed. I had freedom. I could leave.
In the back
"I have no money, no resources, no hopes. I am the happiest man alive." - Henry Miller
Not only do I understand this, I intellectually breathe this. It is in my molecular structure. This is who I am. Either by some good fortune of luck or happy genetic accident, I was born with the native personality of sunshine smiles. Optimists are born, not made. On the other hand, good people are made. Learning right from wrong, compassion, empathy, true altruism and a sense of community. These can be ingrained. The age old question of why do bad things happen to good people is futile. Bad things happen to everybody. Good fortune and tragedy visit all people, just sometimes not in proportion to what an outside observer feels they deserve. You can subscribe to the Karma or Chaos Theory, and each philosophy may be validated in equal measure. The incidents do not matter as much as the aftermath. How you clean up the mess is the real test of character. Coping separates the winners from the losers, and coping is HARD WORK.
History repeats itself only because people gravitate toward the familiar, no matter how destructive. Choosing the unknown path takes courage and resolve. Repeating the cycle of abuse no thought or effort. It is easier to self destruct than to change. Change is the more painful route, no matter how positive the outcome, or benefit to future challenges.
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